Camera Feeva

Jim and I are off to the Bahamas in a week and he got me the sweetest gift....and underwater camera! :)  Check IT out!  Stay tuned for photos from the agua....

Lists

I love lists.  I have bucket lists, places to go in FL lists, to-do lists, Christmas/birthday gift ideas, people's anniversaries, important dates in my life, bills, medical procedures, budgets, things to pick up at Lowes, grocery, wish, doctors, employment, residences...etc.  Sometimes I wonder...is this a normal thing to do?  I mean a "to do" list is one thing but ......?  In all honesty, I really don't care because it helps me to be motivated and to stay motivated and most importantly, NOT TO FORGET!  The older I get, the more I feel the need to compartmentalize everything to makes sense of it all.

It is awesome to have some life long friends as they help you remember the times you've forgotten and vice versa.  I realized this when I went up north for New Years and got the opportunity to visit my ole friends :) To all my fellow list makers out there I have to share my fav list of all is the "present list".  When you go  window shopping with a friend that is hard to buy gifts for just jot down things he/she points out in stores and you'll get a beat on what the person likes, fav colors, tastes etc.  If I run into something cool in May I'll buy it in May.  After all, who wants to go hunting for it later when it is right there?? :)  That is my tip of the day *giggle*.

Ahh it's good to be a chick :D












(taken at farm supply company in Hudson, FL)

A Blog a Day....

.......Ho hum another trip to Miami for Dr. Kennedy - Cleveland Clinic.  How I love the man for making a diagnosis that 10 other endocrinologists couldn't. <3  I feel silly driving this far to get a few questions answered.  It seems like this thing would be so much easier over the phone lol.  I know, I'm dreaming.  I guess I have to be happy to ask the questions I need to ask....like why have I not had a period in months?  Should I really go for another brain MRI?

It was a good weekend.  We got a LOT done!  The master bathroom downstairs is now Sherwin Williams' "Filmy Green".  It is SO pretty!  Just a little touch of green for that peaceful spa feel *ahh*.

We also weeded the lawn, changed the oil x2, cleaned the air filter x2, watched Oceans, washed both cars, balanced the checkbook, watched How to Lose a Guy in 10 days & Nine etc. etc.

Here are a few recent pics from the weekend.  I've been inspired by a fellow photographer ; )

P.S. Thank you for being follower #4 :)

If I blog it, they will come

I have been a writer since I could pick up a pencil.  I still have my first pink, fabric covered journal that my Aunt Jenny and Uncle Greg gave me when I was about 10 (1987-yikes).  I have some OCD linked to my writing.  Should it be on paper or on the computer?  On Microsoft Word or Works?  In a lined journal or in a blog?  I hate OCDness!  I have to admit it seems to have gotten better although I'm convinced that my plummeted energy level just allows for no crazy organization.  And so I write....lists in the iphone.....blog material in the blog...personal stuff in a lined journal.....my favorite poetry on a computer somewhere.  I feel all spread out.  I couldn't possibly write my heart in this blog?  Or could I?  I mean I have no followers really so would I even need to worry?  :(  It makes me kinda sad.  I have not really "advertised" to friends or family because I never know what I'm going to say *chuckle*  When I look at other's blogs they all have a dozen or a thousand readers.  Of course they all make a daily commitment..... *sigh* as opposed to my typical 5 little blurbs.  Odd huh?  Why is it always 5?  Oh well, I figure if I write...they will come....someday.

P.S. When I first met Jim I started to transcribe all my decades of poetry into the computer.  It took me months but it is done!

Home Deco

I saw Nate Berkus on my fav show today.  He gave me some much needed validation.  He said decorating your home takes both time and money.  Hmmm....logical yes?  Sure, of course!  Why was this so validating you ask? Well, I watch a lot of HGTV, Nate Burkus, Peter Walsh etc. and after a while my vision has become dangerously tainted.  I think to myself I have lived in this house for a year and it still feels naked and incomplete...if I was Nate it'd be done in 48 hours.  I have to remember Nate has access to things I don't: money, metropolitan shoppes, Oprah and very often STAFF!  Thank you Nate for reminding me that someday it will feel like home. :)

motivation and a lack thereof

I sit day after day thinking
So many projects to do
Each day comes and goes and I lack the motivation
I've been lacking the motivation for what feels like forever
I think that it may be something chemical within me
I know that I can have a lot of get up and go
It has been gone for a while

Once upon a time, I had awful issues with anxiety
I was given Klonopin, Valium, Xanax and Ativan
NOTHING worked!
Since that time I have noticed it has waned significantly
Recently the same anxious feelings came back ten fold
I took some Progesterone for 3 days and Whalah! Gone!

This leads me to question depression, fatigue, anxiety....
How many things are we given a Benzo or SSRI for when we truly need something totally different?
How many times have I wondered why that medication was unsuccessful?
The answer: many

I wish that I could find out what hormone is related to energy and motivation.
Unfortunately, education materials do not catagorize things like that.
They look at weight gain, insomnia, hot flashes etc.
My gut tells me - my gut KNOWS that everything is related.

My list:

• move pictures into new (well, October 2009) photo software
• paint most of the walls
• touch up paint MBA
• scan old photos
• ebay t's, boots and tickets
• watch Life with Jim
• take down wire in kitchen
• find a job
• get a coffee grinder replacement
• learn how to set up the projector

blah blah blah

Mediation May

Mediation May

The mediation is still stirring. I went to Tampa last week to sit with my lawyer, mediator, lawyer for other side, Dad of girl that hit me oh and the blood sucking insurance company that refuses to pay me even though I cannot move my neck without crunchy sounds.  They offered me 10k.  I countered them 50k.  They offered me 20k.  I countered them 50k.  They offered me 40k and there it lies....  The attorney was supposed to have me exact numbers: attorney's fees, case costs, medical bills etc. so I could back them out and see my in-pocket/walk away with amount.  He cannot get it together to do this.  Jim and I sat in the car trying to get a word in edge wise.  He finally had to scream, literally, in order to get the attorney to shut up so I could ask a question.  Ahh Thank you Jim.  How were we supposed to know that the 5/4/10 5:00pm deadline was complete BS?  Another day to ponder it all. Dear God please let this work out good.